One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was scrolling down my timeline,
Across the sneeze-encrusted screen flashed posts from my account.
For each tweet, I noticed two streaks of RTs,
One belonging to me and one to my mufo.
After the last post from my account flashed before me,
I looked back at the RTs on my page.
I noticed that at many times during my clout-chasing,
Especially at the lowest engagement times,
My mutual’s shares disappeared.
This made me beet red, so I asked my mutual about it.
“My man, you said if I followed back,
You would blow up my posts all day.
But I noticed that when the haters were in my mentions, you really dropped off.
I don’t understand why, when I most needed to blow up,
You would log off”.
He DMed back, “Entrepreneur influencer, I think you’re based and will never log off,
Never, ever, not even when I’m at work or in the shower,
When you didn’t see my RTs,
That’s when I was inflating your metrics with my bots”.
